De Amerikaanse presidentsverkiezingen 2004
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vrijdag, juli 30, 2004
"Did you all hear former President Clinton's speech Monday night? It was great. ... You know it made me kind of nostalgic. It reminded me of a different time when presidents could actually talk." —Jay Leno
"Illinois senatorial candidate Barack Obama, he's the new rising star of the Democratic party. He gave the keynote address at the Democratic convention. When they told President Bush about Obama, Bush said, 'Isn't that the guy we can't find? Why don't we grab him? He was right there!'" —Jay Leno "And the big convention kickoff. Monday's theme: 'The Kerry-Edwards plan for America's future.' It was a powerful message lacking only Kerry, Edwards, and a plan for America's future. In its stead: dance party!" —Jon Stewart "Former President Clinton did not give the keynote address. However, he did give a key, a note and his address to a waitress who was working the concession stand." —Jay Leno "It's now being reported that John Edwards' younger brother, Wesley, turned himself in to the state of Colorado for a warrant relating to a 1993 DUI arrest ... This proves Edwards is presidential. Have you noticed that most presidents have embarrassing brothers? Bill Clinton had Roger Clinton; Jimmy Carter had his brother, Billy Carter. You know the embarrassing brother in the Bush family? George." —Jay Leno "Democrats were reluctant to allow Al-Jazeera in their convention, because they thought their coverage would be biased and hostile. Then they realized it couldn't be any worse than Fox News." —Jay Leno "According to a poll in Time magazine, 53 percent of people say it's time for someone else to be president. The other 47 percent said they were happy with Dick Cheney." —Jay Leno "There was one uncomfortable moment when Al Gore accepted the nomination." —David Letterman "Michael Moore was in attendance at the convention ... which explains the extraordinarily tight security around the buffet." —David Letterman "Howard Dean spoke at the Democratic Convention. They didn't give him a time limit, they just said, 'Turn the lights out when you leave.'" —Craig Kilborn
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