De Amerikaanse presidentsverkiezingen 2004

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donderdag, september 23, 2004
Lachen om het circus
"In a fiery speech at New York University, John Kerry lashed out at President Bush. Kerry said, 'By one count, the president offered 23 different rationales for this war.' And Kerry was furious; he's got twice as many as that!" --Jay Leno
"Did you know John Kerry is going to be appearing on 'Dr. Phil' next week? Is that how bad his campaign is going? He needs grief counseling now?" --Jay Leno
"What happened to John Edwards? You know, I thought you weren't supposed to go into your secret location until after you're vice president!" --Jay Leno
"President Bush still continuing to lead in the polls. In fact when John Kerry was told the latest poll numbers, he called President Clinton again. Not for advice, just to make sure he had his vote. 'You're still with me right?'" --Jay Leno
"Bush and Kerry are still arguing over the details of the debates. Here's what I'd like to see: Can they get the orchestra from the Emmy Awards for the debates? So when a candidate starts going on and on ... just play that song until they shut up." --Jay Leno
"A Bush administration official told Congress yesterday that the war in Iraq could cost 60 billion dollars. Yeah, President Bush said he plans to pay for it with a video series called, 'Prison Guards Gone Wild.'" --Conan O'Brien
Bush and Kerry have agreed to three debates. The first debate will cover the 1960's, the second debate will cover the early 70's -- and in the third debate, if there's time, they will cover some topical issues. --Jay Leno
The first debate will actually take place in Miami, Florida. Boy, first all those hurricanes! And now Bush and Kerry are going to go there. Haven't these people suffered enough?! --Jay Leno
President Bush spoke to the United Nations today. The bad news -- the nations are united against us. --Jay Leno
This morning, President Bush spoke to the United Nations. A little later, John Kerry spoke at a live press conference that was seen around the world. And then Ralph Nader spoke to some people who were having lunch next to him at the International House of Pancakes. --Jay Leno




© Marc van Gestel 2003 - 2004