De Amerikaanse presidentsverkiezingen 2004
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vrijdag, november 19, 2004
"I guess you all heard about this... The Secret Service has doubled guards around the White House. Not to keep people out, but to keep any more of Bush's cabinet members from escaping." – Jay Leno
"Do you believe this? I haven't seen this many secretaries fleeing the Oval Office since Clinton was there." – Jay Leno "Contradicting earlier reports, Homeland Security Director Tom Ridge said reports that he's stepping down are 'news to him.' News to him? Why is Homeland Security always the last to know?!" – Jay Leno "Kind of ironic... The only cabinet member whose heart is still in it -- Dick Cheney." – Jay Leno "As I'm sure you know, Secretary of State Colin Powell has resigned. He says he will stay on to help with the transition. So basically he's now just a semi-colin." – Jay Leno "Tomorrow is the opening of the Bill Clinton Presidential Library. Yeah, the opening ceremonies will feature speeches by former presidents, a 100-piece orchestra, and a wet T-shirt contest." --Conan O'Brien "Today was the day President Bush was going to pardon the presidential turkey. ... But before he could pardon him, he resigned." --David Letterman "You know what happens to the turkeys who are pardoned every year? They are released to a farm and they live out the rest of their lives on this little farm. Or at least that's what they tell President Bush." --Jay Leno "So Colin Powell has resigned and Condoleezza Rice is replacing him and in 2009, she'll replace Jay Leno." --David Letterman "It's kind of weird. Bush wins the election and everyone is leaving. In fact the Bush twins are being replaced by the Hilton sisters." --David Letterman "Colin Powell said today no one should be surprised that he's leaving. He said throughout his first term, he told President Bush that he always thought he would only serve one term and Bush said, 'Me too'!" --Jay Leno "President Bush announced that he would not be burying any more nuclear waste in Nevada. ... He said he is looking for a new site in a blue state." --David Letterman
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